What is a Birthday

What is a Birthday?

To many, a birthday is a mark of how long they’ve been alive, year by year marking their age. But what if you weren’t supposed to have any more birthdays? What then? What are birthdays?

In 2000, I was told to go home and make my affairs in order and say goodbye to everyone I loved. I was diagnosed with a terminal illness and given only a few months to live.

In 2004, I was overdosed and told that any treatment I chose would just further damage my body and there wasn’t anything that was a viable treatment.

In 2008, on my birthday, I coded for 49 minutes. I was clinically dead.

Those were the depressing parts.

But what about the fact that it’s 2023 and I’m still alive and well, turning 50? 23 years after being told I’d not make it another year.

I celebrate the life I have, I fight for today, and I live it with my heart and soul.

A birthday is a reminder that we are alive. It is a gift. It is a chance to start over, to make new memories, and to live our lives to the fullest.

So, if you’re reading this, I want you to know that you are loved. You are cherished. And you are worthy of a happy birthday.

Celebrate your life. Fight for today. And live it with your heart and soul.

Getting my feet back under me

Slowly but surely I’m getting my feet back under me. Even though the last treatment was not as long/strong as the prior treatments, it knocked the pudding out of me. Took me longer than I wanted to recover but we are on the right track. I started to get the dreaded man flu aka a cold this week but so far I’ve been able to keep ahead of it.

Thank you, everyone, for your support and love, without it this would not be possible.

I find that while going through treatment I tend to write more and then as my health gets better I stop writing. I have toyed with talking about Service dogs since I’ve been a handler for 12 years now. What else would interest people to keep coming back? Ideas?

Great Surprises

Sometimes it’s a perfect stranger or strangers with the best timing with a surprise. I had a really bad week this week mentally and emotionally.

I came home today from work to a box with drawings of 2 service dogs, an American flag, and the word hope with some first names. Opening the box I found that it was a care package with several handmade things and some to pass the time while going through treatment. I don’t know who submitted my name to this organization Phils Friends but they took a lot of thought into what they put in my box making it personal. The blanket has dogs on it in a camo pattern, the hat is a hand-made crochet hat, a journal book, some toothpaste and the ever needed took brush, lotion tissues, cards, and sudoku are just a few of the items in this amazing care package.

Whoever submitted my name Thank you very much and Phils Friends thank you for the amazing care package.

Who do you get your strength from?

So many times I sit and write about myself and my life but what about those around me?  The ones who’ve help me fight this demon?   They are the unsung heroes, without them I’d not be able to fight like I do or as long as I have. Each of them offers something. Continue reading

A Story

All of us have a story to tell.  What’s your story?  I have been telling my story for awhile now.  Today I’m not going to tell my story I’m going to tell a story of a little girl name Megan.

Almost every weekend you can find me sitting at the counter at Sugar Shack reading a book on my Kindle or other electronic device.  Three seats opened up next to me and a group sat down.  I noticed that they were all deaf, and talking in sign amongst the themselves.  The best I can do is follow less than a percent of what they were saying but that’s irrelevant.  They ordered their drinks and continued to talk and decide what to order.   Continue reading

Days In Remission

In Remission for 211 days.


June 2023